Is Glycerol Alcohol?

Just listening to “The Greatest Day” by Take That, it was on the telly in my bedroom when I came out of the bath, first time I’ve heard it.
I really don’t know what bug got hold of me but its been really weird dreams, always back in my past, then I got to thinking in the middle of one of my coughing fits in the middle of the night if you really live totally in the moment you cant think or write, your mind has gotta be just “in the moment”, it was so weird that I wrote it on the sticky pad at the side of my bed which Luke uses to remind me to do things.
Overall so far my 4th week at The Monastery has gone well, I am starting to tune into some rudimentary forms collective consciousness of the place but its voice is very distant yet, I did get a surprise when I left the office to use Trap 1 and found no toilet roll, it was the second time this had happened and I had to shuffle round into Trap 2 to get a roll thankfully no body came in but I did see a mirage of Father Carolgees on the toilet door.
Living with Harry and Betty, well I feel like more of the family now, I bet very soon I’ll be toddling up to Harrys house for Christmas Dinner with my two dogs, my brother Cylar, my dad Davros, my mum Battyeford Lill and my son Luke.
In fact Harry doesn’t live 2 minutes from my house, I had to laugh today, Betty was going off her head in her throne room penthouse office, while I was outside with Harry who had come for today’s wagon load.
I was telling Harry that when she starts calling me messy and disorganised is when she is about to go into niggly mode because she was getting all flustered about trying to sort one problem out but kept running into barriers.
Harry said he hoped I would meet “explode mode” and then there would be less for him to have to put up with later.
Earlier in the week Tuesday I think it was, Betty left me on my own and had a day off, luckily Ms Bickerdyke was there in the office to entertain me, Ms Bickerdyke used to be called The Headmistress and I will be just as likely to refer to her either as The Headmistress or Ms Bickerdyke depending on what mode she is in for the foreseeable future.
Ms Bickerdyke is the Group Purchasing Manager and I think she works for the Aggregates division of the Ewoks, anyway she was in her office on Tuesday when a rep who insisted on seeing me despite me telling her that the suppliers we used were decided centrally came.
I don’t think she could wait to leave, I couldn’t really say oh yes I would love to use you as my supplier but the lady in the next office is listening to everything you say and is likely to come barging out any minute if I agree to anything.
I politely went middle of the road and said if given a default position I would use the suppliers that my predecessor Father Fester had used before he disappeared into the Specials department with Croaky, this seemed to keep her happy, in retrospect I should of made her a cup of tea and talked to her in the meeting room but I had forgot Betty was off and I could hardly ask our manager to hold the desk while I went into a meeting with a lady from a foreign supplier.
All that on top of getting no sleep due to coughing all the time, I had a look at some cough medicines, when I went to Tesco’s with my mum, but I didn’t trust them, I mean is “glycerol” alcohol?
Wednesday was a great day and it cheered me up, I had a “PDR” which stands for “Performance Development Review” with my old boss Dolph Lungren, I told him romantically that he was the best boss I had ever had in the whole wide world and he said I was “Part of the Family” over at The Lost World and he was so sorry about the rest of the men, well we both shed a tear as we sat in the dark in the freezing empty office which was long ago in a different era the domain of Rasputin the crazy accountant who dominated a lot of my last few days spent drinking in 2004.
Tubthumper the manager at Nori the fourth member of the four sites here in West Yorkshire which were once owned by the Empire had also come to the monastery to seek solace with the Great N-man, it was the first time I had met him though I had heard a lot about him, I felt a bit silly as he poured praise my way.
Tinky Winky had come from Teletubbieland and they were all in my office along with “The Oracle” and Betty, it was like doing despatch in a market, but at the same time it was nice to see everyone and was in strong contrast to Tuesday when I was left alone with Ms Bickerdyke.
I am gradually getting to know both the Forklift truck drivers, No7 and No13 who are The Chimney Sweep and 40 Setunim, the latter is Inspector Clueso’s Brother and compared to The Lost World the radio waves are not filled with Tarzan Calls but very regimented in that everyone has a number and no one acts silly.
So for well its just about the end of the month and the charts look like this…
Drivers League November 2008
Driver total
1 ڰ 258,544
2 Burty Basset 215,152
3 Harry Potter 137,116
4 Donkey Daz 131,692
5 Wurzel 103,960
6 Tim Terapin 103,960
7 Dino Archers 93,564
8 Van Damn 82,748
9 Dizzy 80,000
10 Flip Flop 72,772
11 LB 72,772
12 Jackie Chan 71,416
13 Obiwan 69,163
14 Keith Chicken 67,801
15 ASH003 57,404
16 Lonesome Pete 51,980
17 Mark Y77MAS 41,584
18 HAN007 41,584
19 OP57HBP 41,584
20 Rodney 41,584
21 P Bellamy X818HFY 41,132
22 Simon FJ57NCE 33,901
23 Richard BX54OVZ 33,449
24 Bruce Forcythe 32,998
25 C Wells DX04DOU 31,188
26 The Crowman 31,188
27 Karl FJ57FZO 31,188
28 Mark Thompson MP08HBP 31,188
29 John SV05FHX 25,312
30 George P30COD 24,408
Body Statistics
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb).
The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women who read this will be finished now.
Most men who read this are still busy checking their thumbs.
Thankfully as I write this entry in my blog on Thursday night, I have been up to ASDA tonight to buy a sarnie and at the same time Luke went to get his chocolate deodorant but for a couple of days I have not had any dinner due to The Monastery having no canteen anymore, it was closed in the great redundancy purge.
I feel a bit like a snake when I get home, eating all my food in one go, I know it cant be good for you but a lot of that sort of thinking I reckon is self fulfilling.