Wacky Walks

Time moves forward another week and looking back I can say another quite enjoyable week overall, Betty is being nice to me as well and we are starting to work as a team instead of pulling in opposite directions.
It’s a completely different atmosphere at the monastery when compared to the “carefree” days at The Lost World and this is not helped by a ill thought out transition to a new purchasing system for accounts and simultaneously a decimating of so many people from the mighty Ewoks.
The purchasing system I will call “The Land of Confusion” or LOC for short, well its quite good actually, much better than the aging AS400 that proceeded it certainly for getting information out, hence my success at making a really good database of our entered orders.
But putting information "in", is fraught with pitfalls, obstacles and occasional complete refusal and with putting an order on depending on everyone in a long line of dominos doing the right thing in sequence which unfortunately is a rare thing for us humans.
Anyway I have been invited to go to Bristol for 2 days to become a “super-user”, its very rare I get invited anywhere by the upper echelons of the Ewoks but I was told by the Tubthumper that I would have to arrange my own accommodation for the couple of nights and claim it back after.
Not having right er good cashflow at the moment I thought I might as well take my tent then presumably there will be somewhere to pitch my tent in the grounds of the Ewoks shiny new HQ, I can then go explore Bristol as well as learn to become a LOC Super user.
Of course Ill have to build a little campfire to cook my burgers, it should be a good day out.

Anyway what about my week, after some good long walks over the weekend, one which me, Luke and the dogs covered about 12 miles and took with us CDirect (known previously as Raving Gay) a local celebrity and who is also my mate Dwain’s nephew, I made a video of it, but after my last videos dismal ratings ( http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Xxa5stQWiW0 ) I have decided to just make do with a photo on here of Luke and CDirect pointing at an old gate post in the middle of some local woods)
Monday was another early morning start but also the last one since Betty was back, that night, at AA I gave over the post of treasurer to Yoda – the meetings founder, he seemed relieved to get the accounts in such a good state after 2 ½ years under my control.
I had taken the key [for the meeting] and me and my good friend Uncle Buck opened up the old church at Holmfirth, Uncle Bucks doing so well, over a year of sobriety and I’m proud of him especially when he offered to do the coffees.
It was a great inspiring meeting for me, a very pretty girl was sharing her story and I felt really warm and at home there, I love that little Monday meeting and it set my week up well, I started praying even more when I was out with the dogs and being a bit nicer to other road users while driving my car, I am even thinking of becoming a Jehovas Witness.
Monday night my mum was poorly so I ended up doing the shopping Tuesday, Luckily Luke who had to come back from his mums early because his cousin, Mr Popple, was poorly said he didn’t get a lift to school by his Aunty Dominating Donna and didnt want to miss another day.
So at least I got a bit of help round the supermarket but by that night I was really tired but had these really powerful dreams of this future world where money didn’t exist and everyone was really nice but it became almost nausatingly nice
I woke up feeling really sick and all day, Wednesday, felt like absolute crap, I had got that bug my mum had and you know what I thought, I used to pay money to feel like this!
In a life so far in the past, in fact in my last incarnation at The Monastery (then known as Hogwarts) Wednesday would have been a good day.
It brings to mind that AA saying your worst day sober is better than your best days a drunk or well something like that, Betty was really nice to me all day, well she didn’t shout too much and made me a few cups of tea.
But of course that was my life my side of the despatch window
On the other side despite the country going to pieces
But despite all the negative
The Ice Road Truckers were battling it out for the pole position on our leader board, and it was a real battle at the top with the three Happy people.
For next month the winner (promises Bob Carolgees our manager) will be awarded with a trophy of some sort, Ms Bickerdyke suggested a special shaped brick at today’s morning meeting about the subject whilst in the doorway of our office.
▼ 4 10 Jackie Chan 51980
Falling then from Decembers No4 position to this weeks No10 is Jackie Chan, the karate kid from Barnsley, he said today after being told he had made No10 that it had been a hard month but February he will be back in the top 5 and then went on to request a “hello”, in my blog, to his parrot “Beaky”
▲ 18 9 Donkey Daz 61460
▲ 73 8 Flip Flop 62376
▲ 17 7 Dizzy 71496
▲ 15 6 Rodney 72772
Climbing nine places to Januarys No9 is Donkey Daz and former Lord Crowman No1’s are Flip Flop and Dizzy with there finishing positions 8 and 7 respectively and like a bat out of hell climbs crazy Rodney at No6
▼ 3 5 Orville 73906
Dropping from last months No3 to this months No5 is Orville who being unable to fly now busies himself in his spare time with his model collection of toy helicopters and aeroplanes but he is a nice guy.
▲ 12 4 Van Damn 91868
A huge climb for the brother of Jackie Chan, who leaps up to No4 from right out of the top ten in December, Van Damn is a phenomenal driver and full of mental stamina that the Ice road requires
▼ 2 3 Keith Chicken 103960
▲ 7 2 Burty Basset 112612
> 1 1 Harry Potter 114356
Despite a massive battle for No1 this month, Harry Potter, Bettys husband, holds his position for another month but it was a much closer battle this week to keep his place some drivers have suggested that Betty might be manipulating the figures but you can have my guarantee that they are genuine figures.
In December Harry finished on just shy of 125,000 while Chicken who this week stumbles to No3 to make way for Burty, took out of the yard 100,000 bricks, so for yet another month Harry reigns supreme.
Overall during January we have taken out of the yard just shy of 3 million bricks which isn’t bad for the hardest month in the middle of this crazy monetary instability we are all told is a global recession
In December we shifted 2.1 million bricks and when I came in November we had a good month with 3.8 million and that’s all the data my little spreadsheet has collected.
Today when I was in the office and me and Betty were working in harmony and Ms Bickerdyke was in her strict black headmistress costume I felt really at home in the moment, the first time I have done at work for a long time.
Yesterday Shandy Pants showed me another of my new jobs counting the raw material stock, a job I used to do at the Lost World, luckily joked Shandy Pants in one of his rare moments of humour, you won’t have all the Honeymonsters Blue-Black spray to count anymore.
I like a bit of variety in my duties but am still a bit nervous of the wages judging by the size of the blokes I have seen visiting Betty recently but I can always resort to hiding under my desk if things get too bad.
Its now Friday night at The Orphanage and Luke and Mr Popple are playing football on the PS3, my mum and dad downstairs have been joined by a surprise visit by Buttercup and her boyfriend.
I haven’t got any certain plans what we are doing over the weekend, I cant wait till the bowling season now, but, the long cold month of February which is promising arctic weather and then there is the month of rebirth March, one of my favourites for taking the dogs out for long walks.
Me and Luke went bowling on Wednesday night, Indoor bowling, but Luke didn’t play too well and I didn’t feel too well having the full force of this one day disease that my mum had given me.
Our team which I have played for just once when they were really desperate have lost nearly every match, but it’s a night out and it keeps me in touch with how my old buddies at Sellers are going on.
Sellers was where I worked before in the nineties and I wrote about quite extensively here http://www.madmickstories.com/Sellers.html it was a crazy decade for me coming from nothing and ending up with nothing but in between many drunken crazy memories.
Coming back to now, life is good and I am enjoying my journey through this incarnation, I love reading and at the moment, I am just enjoying a book called “The Quantum Secret Of Life” by Montague Mendick.
It essence it says that underneath everything there is this Quantum Influence which is our personal holographic world, a bit like the force from star wars and that is the big secret of life, at the page I am reading before I started blogging was talking about conservation of Charge, Parity and Time at the really lowest levels of particle physics.
I get the idea that this “organisation” force of life is playing against the 20th Century pedestals of the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics, which basically says as time moves forward everything gets more messed up, a bit like our monetary system.
Anyway I am going to read a bit more now, I have got Monday off as a holiday in order to take my mum to a hospital in Leeds for a scan of some sort, so I will definitely post again then.